A few years ago, I was setting aside time in the Prayer Room, to have a devotional while no one else was there. My mind was racing with areas of sin in my life and I was plotting ways that I could walk in righteousness in the next few weeks. At some point in this chaos, I started to feel the nearness of the Lord. In my mind’s meditations I could see the Lord looking right at me with eyes like fire, looking into the depths of me. I had to sit down, it was as though everything else went dark all around, indicating that it was just Him and me there in that moment. He asked me, “why are you thinking about yesterday as though it was still here? And why are you thinking about tomorrow as though it existed right now? Tomorrow in your thoughts is a fantasy.” He continued speaking, “Here is where I always am. You already have my attention and my affection as I wait here for you. I want your attention, your affection! I want you!” Prayer suddenly became a place in my understanding. It is so simple, all He wants is me in the present moment of every moment. In my weakness He desires me; when I’m tired, when I can’t feel Him, when I’m distracted, and even when I have succumbed to the temptations of sin. There Jesus is, always waiting with a longing heart for me to turn my attention towards Him. He proceeded to speak, “This is the place of abiding.” This place is where I take His word in my hands and speak it back to Him. I reflect back to Him in prayer and song who He is and who I am as revealed in the scriptures. Here I give thanks and praise while I wait on Him to speak to my heart. He continued, “Only in this place of abiding can you bear fruit. Anything you do outside of this place will not bear the fruit that will last.” Only by His grace can I walk in obedience to the Lord. I can not walk in righteousness in my own strength. And He actually yearns to walk this out with me, to help me. He longs to be gracious, to show compassion, and delights in mercy. Jesus wants humility. In meekness, I look to Him, full dependence upon relationship with Him. Oh the depths of Grace and Mercy He has for us. Oh the depths of loving kindness that is poured out within the hearts of those who call upon His name. His forgiveness always reaches far beyond the point of comfort and causing knees to hit the ground under so great a mercy.
Isaiah 30:18 /// Song of Songs 2:14; 4:9 /// John 15:4
Written by: Zack Roberts