While meditating up the judgements released by the hands of Jesus my heart is confronted with a God that I cannot comprehend on my own. I find God’s judgments bring offense to my heart. When I see The Lord’s actions in scripture that appear to conflict with what I know Him to be, I am tempted to ignore it or build a theology around it that makes me feel at ease. I would venture to say that when we see God’s judgments and are offended by them, exposed within our hearts, is a lack of trusting in His divine nature. We are confronted with ourselves; do we really believe that He is good in all He does? Do we really trust His leadership? I have also found that the anxiety that rises within me as I meditate upon these events exposes fear of losing the comforts that are taking the place of God in my life. My desire is to be like Paul who found full satisfaction in Christ alone; for in having much, having little, and even in persecution he rejoiced. When God acts in judgment, He is manifesting who He is as just and a righteous judge; He does not lay down His attribute of love and mercy to act in another. No, our God is love and all that He does is expressing fully His divine nature. I cannot ignore that it is Jesus who breaks open the seals. I want to worship God in truth as revealed in the whole of scripture; and not the cut and paste image that I have built in my mind in the name of what feels good. I want all of God, for who He is, because I know that He is good.